A note on restaurant service

Dear world,
Let me just start out by saying this: if you cannot afford to tip your server, then you cannot afford to eat out. Go eat at Burger King, Tabo Bell, Zupa's, or Costa Vida, where tipping is not necessary.
Now that we've covered the basics, let me explain how to tip, since obviously, a lot of you have forgotten. The STANDARD for tipping is 15%. That means that if your server is STANDARD, you should give them 15%. If your server is, in any way, above average (say, extra friendly, gives you good recommendations, refills your drinks, etc.), you should tip them 20% or more. ONLY if your server is INCREDIBLY below average should you tip 10%. And by this, I mean that your server either COMPLETELY ignored your, or very obviously spit in your food for no other reason than that they felt like being an idiot to you. If your food took a long time, NINE TIMES OUT OF TEN, it was NOT your server's fault. DO NOT penalize them for this. Most of the time, they are in the kitchen, trying their hardest to get your food out to you faster. IN ABSOLUTELY NO CIRCUMSTANCE should you EVER tip your server under 10%. You might think you're making a statement, but let me tell you what you're ACTUALLY doing. You are SCREWING OVER YOUR SERVER'S LIFE. In case any of you don't know, servers make approximately TWO DOLLARS an hour. That's not even a THIRD of minimum wage. In other words, SERVERS RELY ON TIPS. So when you think you're being smart by not leaving any sort of tip, or leaving your pocket change, you are not only RUINING that server's night, you are also WASTING THEIR TIME, because they could have spent that time they spent on you taking care of another table that actually knows how to tip. So next time you go out to dinner, think to yourself before hand, "Hmm, do I have the money to leave a decent tip for my server?" If not, rethink your decision to dine at a restaurant, and maybe go pick up some Lean Cuisine from the grocery store. Thanks.

Much love,
Kristin